Hi ,
We often don’t realize how much drama may be in our lives. This is magnified tenfold as the holidays approach. We’re not aware of
the chaos or stress we experience as being drama. We perceive it as normal – this is the way our family, friends, or workplace is. This happens because we are close to the situation and the people involved, making it very difficult to see things objectively. Fortunately, there are signals that alert us to drama. Feeling frequently drained, confused, or having the urge to help, rescue, or put out ongoing fires
are very good signals that drama is present.
During the holidays, we’re often bombarded by family and society’s expectations and traditions to live up to, as well as our own. This combined with almost guaranteed holiday glitches, others’ holiday stress and
disregard for our boundaries, and unrealistic demands placed on us set the stage for Drama to enter. And then there’s the pressure to do things perfectly.😀
Some Important Questions:
How often do you have a conversation with someone in your life, and afterwards feel exhausted, frustrated or stressed?
As the holidays approach, are you experiencing some joy, peace, uplifting energy or much
pressure, stress, nonstop busyness and overwhelm?
Would you describe an area or relationship in your life now as chaotic, roller coaster-like, crisis-oriented, or always problem-focused?
Are others frequently turning to you to complain, talk about their latest crisis, or be their forever cheerleader/therapist? Does anyone in your life see himself/herself as a victim or a martyr? People with these issues are often draining and drama-oriented.
If the answer to any of the above is yes, you have drama not so fa la la;) going on in your life. This is important to become aware of – as ongoing drama significantly affects our energy, wellbeing, ability to focus on our own lives and priorities, and takes up much of our valuable time. It also takes away from the joy, connection and cheer of the holidays.
Some Ways to Address Drama:
Consider if there is anyone in your life
now that you feel creates drama (can use the signals above). If so, reflect on how often you interact with this person, and the impact it is likely having on you (scale 1-10 highest). Scores of 6 and above warrant taking action now. This could include setting a boundary with this person, reducing the frequency of communication with him/her, or having an honest conversation with them about your relationship.
This week, bring increased awareness to your interactions with others in your life. Ask your Self how you feel – both during the conversation and afterwards. Do you often feel relaxed, positive, and have the same or better energy level? Do the conversations typically feel reciprocal? If so, wonderful! They are nourishing to you. If not, consider one
action you can take to protect your Self from the drama. Then go ahead, and do it, and notice the increased peace and well-being that follows!😀
Please get in touch at dr.gionta@gmail.com if you would like support and strategies in feeling more peaceful and confident in your relationships and work / life overall. We can talk and explore what the best next steps are for a happier and healthier You in 2024!
To a peaceful and happy holiday,
Dr. Dana
